Welcome to Level 1 of the How To Give A Blow Job (for beginners, mostly)!
Sorry if I am a bit overenthusiastic.
It’s just that I remember being where you were —scouring all over the internet trying to learn how to give a blow job and not seem like the virgin I was.
Let’s just say I did not find anything useful. When I came face to face with a penis, my mind went blank.
I was trying to remember all of the tips and tricks that every article on Google gave me, but I was baffled when it came down to it.
I realized that none of the articles I read covered any of the basics, so I created this easy-to-follow guide.
Compiled from extensive research and experience, this guide will teach you the basics of fellatio.
It will help you build a strong foundation of skills that you can always revisit.
Before we get into it, I highly recommend that you read my “Everything You Should Know Before Giving A Blow Job” article.
That article covers all of the questions you may have and everything you can expect when giving your first blow job.
This article is more like an instruction manual.
While this article targets beginners and first-timers, it also has something for those of you who probably haven’t given a blow job in months or years even. Or maybe you want to make sure you have the basics down.
There is something valuable here for everyone.
Reminder
Before we begin, I want to preface by saying that giving a blow job should be an enjoyable experience for both parties.
Please don’t do it because you feel forced or because you want someone to like you.
It should be fun, so do it with someone you trust and makes it fun for you.
Ready? Let’s begin.
Before You Start Blowing Them
Since this guide is for beginners, I want to cover some things y’all probably haven’t considered.
Communication
Communication is so important, but it often gets overlooked because people think it is “awkward” or “it will ruin the moment.”
If that’s your mentality, then you are not ready to give a blow job.
Both of you need to create a space where y’all can express your wants, needs, and concerns.
Tell them what you are comfortable with and not comfortable with.
For instance, do you want your hair pulled, do you want to be gagged, do you want them to shove your head down? Where do you want them to cum? Do you want to swallow? If not, have a napkin, towel, or extra t-shirt at the ready.
Think about these questions and let them know your answer.
Furthermore, ask them what they like and want to experience that way, y’all can meet in the middle with what you are willing to give within your boundaries.
Blow Job Safety Tips
I have a more detailed section on this in my other article (click here), but I need to cover it here.
For your first time giving a blow job, I highly recommend using a flavored condom.
Dicks come with their own taste and texture. A flavored condom with help you ease into this.
There are so many flavors making the experience that much more enjoyable, and it will protect you from getting an STI in your mouth.
Yes, you can get an STI from oral sex.
No, you cannot use the flavored condom for penetrative sex.
Location
Like real estate, blow jobs are all about location, location, location!
I’m just kidding, but location plays a big part in how comfortable you are performing this intimate task.
If you are doing this in a car, make sure you find a nice empty parking lot that cops don’t hang around.
If you are doing this at your house or theirs, make sure to lock the door.
Try to find a place where you feel safe and comfortable so you can focus on the task at hand.
Positions for Beginners
Now you may be thinking, “what is the best position to be giving a blow job in?”
Great news, there are multiple positions!
The bad news, many of them aren’t that comfortable.
Such as 69. Sexy and hot in theory, more difficult to execute in person.
For my beginners and anybody really, I suggest the good old-fashion on your knees.
This position is excellent because you have full access, mobility, and you don’t have to angle yourself weirdly.
Have the receiver standing with their back against the wall or sitting on the edge of a bed or chair.
Make sure you get a pillow to kneel on because you will be down there for a while.
Having them lying on the bed while you hover over them is also an option, but you will have to angle yourself weirdly, and the bed is not good at supporting your weight.
But find what works for you.
Getting Them Hard
Now we’re getting to the good stuff. Getting them hard, which, no pun intended, is not too hard.
The good thing about penises is that most of them become aroused by the smallest amounts of stimulation, making them hard before anything happens, but if that’s not the case, then foreplay.
Foreplay is intimate acts that you do to turn the other person on. This can be as simple as kissing their neck, making out with them, or dirty talking.
You can also put the palm of your hand on their dick while you are kissing their neck and lightly grip until they get hard.
Or you can kiss them right above their underwear line to tease them or use your fingertips to touch the same area gently.
Additionally, you can put their flaccid (not hard) penis in your mouth. You can suck gently while using your tongue to swirl around it and then sucking on it as you pull it out of your mouth.
Think of it like a lollipop—same technique, just slower and more gently.
Beginner Blow Job Techniques
Now we are getting to the technique.
Don’t Worry
Since this is a beginner-friendly blow job guide, I will only cover the basics of giving a blow job. I will not be covering the following topics in this post because I believe they are too advanced for beginners or individuals who are trying to build a solid skillset:
- Deep-throating
- Advanced hand job techniques
- Sex Toys
- Anal Penetration
- Or any other fancy tricks you may have heard about or seen on porn
Pace
For the love of God and your throat, please start slow. Do not try to take their entire dick into your mouth at once to prove a point.
You will probably end up gagging and choking and not in a hot way.
So find a good rhythm and technique and stick with that.
Blow Job Basics
Now that your partner is ready and hard, you will want to get their dick wet.
You can start by using your tongue to lick from the base of the shaft all the way to the head of the penis.
If you are feeling a bit savage, you can spit directly onto their penis and use your hands to spread the saliva around.
As you put their penis into your mouth, you are going to want to angle it up towards the roof of your mouth, not down.
By doing this, you are preventing a reaction from your gag reflex.
Now that their dick is in your mouth, as far as it can go without gagging, close your lips in an “O” shape and slide the penis in and out of your mouth.
The “O” shape of your lips creates a vacuum seal with your mouth as you go up and down their shaft.
Remember to start slow and then gradually build up speed.
Note: You can begin at any point on the shaft. You do not have to have their entire dick in your mouth. You can start at the head or the middle of the shaft.
Tongue
Now you may be wondering, “Well, there is a dick in my mouth; what the hell do I do with my tongue?”
As you move the penis in and out of your mouth, your tongue will follow your movements.
You can also use your tongue to:
- To swirl around the head of the penis
- Use it to lick up and down the shaft
- Use the tip of your tongue to flick the frenulum, which is the underside of the penis.
Your tongue can just be along for the ride, or you can make it part of the main event.
Don’t stress yourself out too much trying to get it perfect. Do what feels right and good to you.
Hands
Now you may be wondering what the fuck do I do with my hands?
You can do several things, but do not try to do everything at once if you are a beginner.
For instance, you can use your hands to go up and down the shaft.
To do this, take one hand and place it before your mouth on the shaft.
Then simultaneously, use your hand to go up and down the penis with your mouth.
If they are well-endowed (aka big dick), you can use both hands simultaneously.
Grip gently. Your hands are acting as an extension of your lips.
This will give the sensation that they are being deep-throated.
You can also put your hands on their thighs to either help steady yourself or help push themselves deeper into your mouth if that is something you want.
You can also go exploring if they are okay with it.
I honestly do not recommend first-timers doing this because you want to concentrate on your mouth technique and get that down first.
But you can also use your hands to play with their balls (more detail below), use your hands to massage their perineum (taint), massage their dick gently, or use a finger to stick it up to their anus.
In the Level 2 version of this guide, I will go into more detailed hand job techniques that you can incorporate.
Balls
Since this guide is for beginners who are new to giving blow jobs, I recommend not trying this your first time.
I whole-heartedly believe that you should wait because first of all, you don’t want to overwhelm yourself.
Second of all, you don’t want to show them all your tricks in one hand, and they probably don’t deserve it either.
But I am going to tell you one simple trick that you can keep in your back pocket.
First thing, while you are down there, you can ask them, “Hey, do you want me to play with your balls?”
Most guys will be surprised by this because they most likely have never had someone play with their balls during a blow job so that they may be on the offense at first, but if executed correctly, they will be begging for it each time.
So there are several things you can do with their balls.
- You can lick them.
- You can suck on them.
- You can put one ball or both into your mouth (don’t gag yourself).
- You can GENTLY massage them with one or both of your hands.
So while you are sucking their dick, one of your hands can be palming their balls gently one at a time, while your other hand is on their thigh supporting you. Or you can use your mouth to either kiss or suck GENTLY on one and then switch to the next.
Dry Mouth
If your mouth gets dry anytime during your performance, don’t be afraid to take a sip of water.
Or bring a flavored lube (strawberry is my favorite).
Either of these options are fine but remember that you can stop even if they haven’t cum yet if you are tired.
It’s about your pleasure too.
Ending the Blow Job
We are now getting towards the end of the blowjob.
You may be wondering how do I know if we are getting to the end?
- Your mouth and hands are exhausted.
- They are about to cum.
- You are ready to move on to a different activity.
Tired
If anytime during your performance you get tired of your mouth starts to cramp up,
DON’T BE AFRAID TO TELL YOUR PARTNER!
If you are done, then you are done.
Please don’t push yourself for their sake.
Spit or Swallow?
The ultimate question has haunted people since the beginning of time (because blow jobs have been around that long).
This is a personal question that you need to ask yourself.
Do you feel comfortable doing it? Do you want to, or are they pressuring you?
Hopefully, you talked about this before giving them the blowjob because trying to find them something to cum in a second right before they are about bust is asking for a disaster to happen.
If you don’t want to swallow, I recommend telling them to find a different place to cum.
It can be in a towel, an old shirt, a sock, or if you are comfortable with it, they can cum somewhere on your body, such as your chest or hands.
They have so many other options than your mouth.
Advice
If you have them cum in your mouth, then I suggest you swallow because having to spit the cum out is like reliving the experience, and honestly, cum leaves a not so pleasant aftertaste.
P.S. It’s salty.
Quick Tip: When they are on the verge of cumming, stick their dick to the back of your throat (as far as you can go without choking). Once they cum you will swallow it quickly.
This reduces the amount you will have to taste, and it makes the process quicker.
But if you don’t want to swallow, THEN DON’T SWALLOW AND DON’T LET THEM PRESSURE YOU INTO DOING IT!
Trust me when I say they won’t like you more just because you swallowed their cum.
Now What?
The blow job is over!
Yay, you did it!
Pat yourself on the back because you did a fantastic job!
You may be wondering, “what should we do now?”
Well, now you can enjoy the fruit of your looms.
Maybe y’all can have sex now, or they could go down on you (p.s. don’t go down on somebody expecting something in return).
Or y’all can just chill and talk or go out to get a bite to eat.
It depends on what y’all want to do, and it shouldn’t be awkward.
Just enjoy the aftermath and be proud of yourself.
Grain of Salt
Keep in mind that not everyone is going to enjoy the same techniques.
Maybe one person loves to have their balls licked, and the next one absolutely hates it.
Just keep an open mind and don’t be afraid to try something different (with their consent, of course).
Also, remember to enjoy the process because it is about your pleasure too.
The goal is not about getting them to cum. It is about learning each other bodies and seeing what works for that person.
If you guys have any tips you wished you knew as a beginner, comment down below so we can all help each other out.
