10 Ways To Prep For Anal Sex [Successfully]

May, 05, 2021

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Ahhh, anal sex.

With its growing popularity in media and among people under the age of 45, you’d think more people would know how to make anal sex an enjoyable experience for both parties, but turns out they don’t.

Nevertheless, I’ve heard countless tales of people hating anal sex because their experience was painful, uncomfortable, and they were afraid they were going to poop on their partner.

That is when I realized that many people did not know that anal sex was NOT a spur-of-the-moment kind of activity.

People treat anal sex as if it’s just a new position when in reality, it is much deeper than that (literally and figuratively).

It is its own experience that requires way more preparation and communication than a new sex position.

So without further ado, let’s explore the top 10 ways to prepare for anal sex to make it the best experience possible.

Related Article: Everything You Need To Know Before Having Anal Sex

1) Lube, lube, lube

For the love of God, when doing anal, you NEED LUBE!

Unlike the vagina, the anus is not self-lubricating. This means that no matter how aroused a person is, it will be dry back there, and if you try doing anything, it will be most likely be painful.

The lack of lubrication leads to painful anal sex because it causes friction, leading to tears in the tissue of the anus, leading to bleeding.

So whether you are the top or bottom, bring lube.

And no, spit will not cut it because it will dry out as quickly as you put it on.

Plus, why not lube? You can choose between a water-based, silicone-based, or oil-based lubricant.

Keep in mind that you can not use an oil-based lubricant with a condom. It will break the condom down, letting STIs roam freely between you and your partner.

Side Note: A water-based lube compared to a silicone-based lubricant may dry out quicker, so be sure to use a lot.

2) Condoms or No Condoms?

Anal sex has the highest risk for STI transmission, and this is due to the delicate tissue located in and around the anus.

It is prone to tearing and bleeding, which allows for STIs to enter the bloodstream with ease.

Using condoms not only helps prevent the transfer of STIs and lowers your risk for infections, but it also makes for easy and quick cleanup.

Think about it: if the person you are having sex with has a dick and they cum in you, you will be trying to push out that cum for a while.

Using condoms prevents this issue.

Moreover, if you decide to use condoms, be sure to switch to a fresh, new condom when moving to a different activity.

Don’t go from anus to vagina or mouth and back again without changing the condom because that is a breeding ground for infection.

If you don’t want to use condoms, at least get tested along with the person you will have sex with.

The last thing you want is to deal with an STI in a location that is not easily accessible to you.

Related Article: The Ultimate Guide to Condoms: Different Types & Styles

3) Foreplay

Foreplay, foreplay, foreplay!

Most people see this as optional, but it’s mandatory.

Like every other part in the body, the anus needs to be warmed up and ready before it gets fucked over.

Foreplay to the anal region can start as simple as light touching and pressure to the area.

Then if you feel ready, you can move up to your fingers. Start with one and then two.

If you are enjoying the whole process and feel ready, you can try inserting a penis.

Start with the tip, make sure it’s lubed up, and then if you want, you can push back on the penis to control how much is going in.

Pro Tip: It takes around 10-20 minutes to be fully aroused and have your sphincter relaxed enough to let anything get past it.

So take your time and enjoy the process.

4) Work Your Way Up

Remember above when I said to start with some fingers and then progress from there?

Yeah, well, it’s the same concept.

You will never want to start with your hookup’s 6-inch dick, especially if you never had any anal play.

It’s just a recipe for disaster.

Your anus is comprised of 2 different sphincter muscles: the external and internal.

Their jobs are to keep the stool in and prevent you from pooping yourself daily.

If you have never had any anal stimulation, they will be very resistant to Chad trying to shove his dick up there.

Anal Training- CTM

This can lead to tearing, bleeding, hemorrhoids, and a plethora of other issues.

So work your way up to Chad’s dick.

You can use an anal training kit to accustom the sphincter muscles to the sensation of anal sex, or you can use your fingers, small toys and then start with the tip of the dick.

Remember to give yourself plenty of time to become aroused and enjoy the process.

It’s not about how fast you can get a dick up there.

It’s about having fun.

5) Cut Your Finger Nails

While long fingernails can be aesthetically pleasing, they are also a breeding ground for bacteria.

Let’s be honest; we don’t always scrub under our nails when we wash our hands.

Just think about what gets trapped under there.

Furthermore, long nails mean that there is a higher chance that you might cut your partner or scratch them, creating tears in the tissue in and around the anus.

First of all, ouch!

Second of all, those tears open you or your partner up to STIs, infections, and bleeding.

So do yourself and them a favor by cutting your nails.

6) Cleanliness

Probably the biggest thing people worry about when it comes to anal sex.

And I get it. It’s the hole where poop comes out of.

Luckily, there are a few ways to clean your back door.

You can use an enema after you poop and before having sex.

Remember, it’s not necessary, but it is an option.

Or you can use mild soap and water to clean the area.

Make sure to be gentle.

Lastly, you can take a warm bath. This will ensure that you are clean and relax your muscles and your brain in preparation for anal.

Keep in mind that it is your butthole, and if poop comes out, it is not the end of the world!

There will always be fecal matter, whether you can see it or not because it’s your butthole.

Just be sure to wash up afterward and before moving on to a different sexual activity.

7) Put A Towel Down

Or at least change the sheets from white to a darker color.

Between the lube and the possibility of brown-colored fluid coming out, a dark-colored towel will save you from having to look at it.

Also, it will help clean up the excessive lube, so you aren’t slippin’ and sliding everywhere.

Remember that it’s your butthole, and all of this is entirely normal and nothing to be embarrassed by.

8) Pick A Position

Yes, there is more than one position to do anal in.

There is good, old-fashioned doggy.

If this is your first time being penetrated by a penis, I’d say not to go with this position.

Doggy position allows for deeper penetration, and you don’t want to go super deep for your first time.

Another position is missionary.

Adjust for entry, relax and enjoy.

You can also lay on your stomach while being topped.

See which one works for you.

9) Go Slow

Remember when I said it’s not a race against the clock to see how fast you can get Chad’s dick up there?

Yeah, it’s about enjoying the experience and not hurting yourself in the process.

So go slow.

Be sure to incorporate foreplay in order to relax the sphincter and allow for penetration.

Remember, it takes about 10-20 minutes to become fully aroused.

If there is any pain or there is too much discomfort, please stop.

If you push yourself too hard, you risk not only an injury but a bad experience that can prevent you from retrying it in the future.

Go slow and be present.

10) Communication & Consent

First Time Having Sex-CTM

In a perfect world, you and the person you are having sex with would have already had a long conversation about how you guys will approach anal sex.

How you will prepare for it, how y’all are going to be safe, what type of lube you are going to use, and all that jazz.

But let’s be honest, it’s not a perfect world.

It may come as a spur-of-the-moment thought (don’t recommend that), or maybe you feel ready to try it that night after giving it some thought.

But with every sexual activity, you engage in, be sure to do it with someone who will respect your boundaries, be supportive and caring along the way.

The last thing you want is to be disrespected while in a vulnerable position.

Do it with someone you can be honest with about how you feel and will not through a fit if you ask them to st.op because you are in pain.

Nothing is sexier than someone making sure you are enjoying the experience as much as they are.

Being Prepared For Anal

While anal sex requires more prepping and communication than other forms of sexual activity, it can be an incredible experience.

It can become something that you absolutely love or hate, but it’s worth a few tries.

Be sure to follow these steps to ensure you are in the best position possible to enjoy it.

Remember that anal sex or any other sexual activity does not say anything about your character or who you are as a person.

It’s a butthole, and that’s it!

It’s a fun, new sexual adventure, and you are not a bad person if you enjoy it or hate it.

Don’t judge yourself too harshly, be open-minded, and listen to your body’s boundaries, so you don’t run the risk of hurting yourself.


  1. Healthline | Anal Sex Safety: Everything You Need to Know
  2. Buzzfeed | 29 Things People Wish They Knew About Anal Sex Before Trying It
  3. Bustle | 8 Ways to Prepare for Anal Sex
  4. Bustle | What I Wish I Knew Before I Tried This In Bed


Hi, I am Mia! I am Sex Education Enthusiast and I love bringing people the knowledge they need to make their sex lives better! I always preach that having a healthy sex life is a part of a healthy life overall.

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